Looking Forward

“God is not looking for men of great faith, He is looking for common men to trust His great faithfulness.”

- Hudson Taylor

“Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you are alive, it isn't.”

- Richard Bach

“Unless I am sure I am doing more at home to send the gospel abroad than I can do abroad, I am bound to go.”

- A.B. Simpson

Despite Bremen's religious history, 97-99% of the residents
have never experienced the wonderful salvation of God.

In terms of missions, I will spend the next year or two preparing for work in Bremen. I am planning to stay in the US next summer to take some summer courses and ideally work a job. However, I'm open to the possibility of going to Bremen, though I'm not specifically seeking it out. I've already made some good contacts in the city, namely Wilfried and the Vengas. I came to know David and Robin Vengas in a way that could haven been arranged only by God.

When I was visiting my cousins in Ocala, I was on FaceBook and accidentally clicked the wrong button. This button took me to a page I'd never seen before (or since) containing a list of seemingly random messages. As I was trying to decypher this strange page, I noticed a message listed from two weeks prior. The message was marked as having been read, but I was sure I had never seen it before. It was from a woman named Robin Vengas. Curious, I opened the message.

In the message, Robin introduced herself and her husband. She had stumbled across a link to my blog on FaceBook. Strangely, I have my FaceBook profile configured so that it is impossible for those I don't know (e.g., Robin) to see what I have posted. However, there is no such thing as a coincidence. (That was confirmed when God sent the mailman to pray with me in 2010!) Robin shared hers and David's testimony with me and gave me permission to publish it here. The testimony is amazing, and their work in Bremen so far through their house church Revive Germany is very spirit-filled. Below is the testimony shared with me.

On February 6th, 2013 David, the kids and I arrived in Phoenix. We went back to my home because of a much needed break from the hardships, oppression and overwhelming stress that we had been facing in Germany that were extremely intense for about one year. There had been so much that had happened in our personal lives, church lives, the lives of our children and the extended family that just had been too much to bear any longer. It took a heavy toll on all of us. Every aspect of all of our lives had been attacked and we needed to escape. I needed to go home, to my family, to the sunshine and to the life that I had left 11 years ago when we moved to Germany. I fell into a deep depression during the last months before our trip to the states which threw me into hopelessness and despair. The enemy tried to rob us of all of our joy and of our calling.

During the time where we didn't think things could get any worse, David was informed of a special leave that his company was offering through a co-worker that he "accidentally" bumped into one day. This leave gave him the opportunity to combine the leave with the vacation that we had already scheduled and gave him a time span of 2 months that we could leave Germany to try to recharge our empty batteries. Due to the desperation that we had faced, we had already decided to remove the kids from the German- Social school system and try out homeschooling in the states. David had also "coincidentally" encountered another co-worker that had just applied for a part-time position with the company. During their conversation, David learned of the great part-time plan the company offered which would allow him to combine his vacation days to give him anywhere between 20 to 30 days off every 2 months for a slight reduction in pay. Due to the overwhelming situation we were dealing with,  David made the decision to apply for part-time allowing us to leave Germany whenever we feel the need and would also allow us to set up residency in America.  At that time we didn't realize that God was already feeding us ideas and putting His plan into motion!

We were already aware that we had a call on our lives to proclaim the word of God. There had been many godly men and women that had prophesied or spoken a word over our lives over the previous 4 years. We had the desire within us to evangelize and also felt led to do mission work. And although we faced much persecution from friends and churches in Germany about our radicalism for Jesus and the gospel,  we attempted to march forward and pleaded with God to use us in whatever way He wanted to, surrendering ourselves. But it was as if God was not giving us a suitable assignment or confirmation thereof.  The trials that we faced along the way seem to aid as a distraction keeping us from our true purpose. Although it was a distraction, we know now it was also our training! Just 2 weeks before we left Germany, I was watching a teaching on TV from T.D. Jakes, on how God uses desperation to push you out of the place you are in and into your calling by using the bible story of Ruth and Naomi. I just KNEW that God was speaking to me through that message! But I had NO idea what we were in for!!!

We arrived in Phoenix where we were greeted by my family. We spent a couple of weeks in Phoenix. Then we traveled to Idaho where we spent another 2 weeks with more precious family. The time was wonderful. We laughed and cried! We got to know their new church and pastor and wife whom we connected with right away and were told again that we have a gift and a special  call on our lives. We were sad when the time ended but knew that we needed to go back to Arizona. We needed to get the kids started with school. And we also planned to visit a Patricia King service for a much needed, filling-up. And we also had planned ahead to visit a church by the name of Skyway that we had seen on God TV several times. And that I had visited once as a child in their old building. Their name was familiar and we knew we needed a home church that we could connect to when we are in Arizona. So, the first Sunday that we were back in Goodyear, we went to the second morning service. We walked in, not knowing a soul and sat down on the 4th row from the front. It happened to be the 30th wedding anniversary of the Pastor and his wife. There was a special guest that presented her testimony and gave information on a play that she would be producing at the church. But before all of that took place, the Pastor gave his opening statement as he looked into the camera, he asked God to bless the nation of Germany?!! Then during his opening devotional, he stated that Cindy Jacobs gave a prophecy back in 2006 of how Skyway would be used directly in the re-evangelization of Germany. And that there would be a connection to Germany...!!!! We were in shock! David and I looked at each other surprised and thought "what is going on here?? Is he talking about us??"!!! And then I instantly thought of a friend,  Zach (from Florida) that we had met in Germany the year before that had also visited Skyway to share his ministry during the time we were in Idaho! There was definitely connections! After the service, we waited in the front to introduce ourselves to the Pastor as we usually do when we visit a new church. He eventually made it over to us and asked us who we were. We introduced ourselves and told him that we were from Germany.  His jaw almost hit the floor! He told us that we were the only connection that the church has had to Germany since the prophecy was given! He said he had a gift to see into the lives of people. And he said that he believes we are the special connection and carefully mentioned the possibility of a home church....

We were then invited to meet privately so that we could share our testimony and lives with Pastor Greg Brown. As we shared, he prophesied that we have a high level call of leadership on our lives. He said that he sees us in  a spiritual leadership role. He believes in his spirit that we are the link  to the prophecy that Cindy Jacobs gave back in 2006.  He offered full support in leadership training and providing us with a spiritual covering needed to begin our call to start a house church in Germany.

There were many prayer meetings and leadership meetings that we attended in the time we were in Goodyear where the church leaders prophesied many words over us. One being that we would bring the fire of the Holy Spirit back to Germany and that fire would spread to affect the nation and Europe!

The Prayer Director, Jeanie of the church gave us the actual CD recording from Cindy Jacobs on Easter morning.  Later as we drove to our friend's house for dinner, we popped the CD into the player. We were blown away by what she had said. It was though if God was speaking directly to us! She spoke to the church and said that God is going to use Skyway in the re-evangelisation of Germany. That there would be a direct connection to Germany. Then she said the name Lufthansa.... And said she is hearing the word "here"! Then a man in the audience shouted out that there is a Lufthansa flight school there in Goodyear, the same city of the church that she was speaking in! She said there would be a connection with a pilot from that school and that the name of the church "Sky-way" has significance! With David being a pilot and having trained at the Lufthansa flight school in Goodyear AND us being from Germany we align perfectly with the prophetic word that was given! The fact that we have already set up our children with home schooling , have established residency in Arizona and plan on commuting back and forth to Germany in the near future fits exactly into what we believe God is calling us to do.  In close connection with Skyway, having Pastor Greg and his leadership team as our covering and support, we have decided to branch off and begin a home church in Germany. We firmly believe that this is God's call on our lives. And although, we don't know with our human minds and strength how everything with unfold but we are believing in faith that God has a perfect plan and will use us to carry out His will in the nation of Germany.

During our most recent trip to Arizona, we received spiritual counsel, prayer assistance and other ministerial sessions to aid in the launch of our church in Germany. Amongst the many other incredible experiences we encountered and blessings we received, Pastor Greg anointed and appointed us as Pastors of the new up and coming [Revive Germany]!

Please stand with us in prayer. We need powerful intersession as the principalities over Germany are strong. We know that we will be faced with resistance and most likely persecution. But we also KNOW that our God is GREATER than any adversary! "They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony..." Rev. 12:11

The Vengas have such an incredible testimony, and I found it very inspiring. It reminds us that God will always give us guidance, even when we feel as though we hit a brick wall. This testimony makes me look forward with excitement about what God will do in Bremen the next few years. However, I must still share the Gospel here at home. It would be hypocritical and un-Christlike to ignore the lost in Alabama while boldly proclaiming the Gospel in Germany.

Besides trying to share more about Jesus in my everyday life, I want to start searching out specific opportunities to share the Good News. I have heard about a possible way to do so through some students at the BCM. A few of them participate in a UAB program that pairs  native English speakers with international students who need help learning English. Once or twice per week, the pairs meet to have a guided conversation so that the international student can practice speaking English. This not only allows the students to build a genuine relationship, but it also opens a door to possibly share the Gospel. I hope to get involved in this program next semester.

I have also considered hosting a no-pressure, casual "What do Christians believe" get-together with some food. It would provide an opportunity for foreign students, many of whom were never exposed to Christianity until coming to the US, to learn intellectually about the Gospel without ever setting foot in a church or starting an awkward conversation with a (nominally) Christian friend. While it is certainly not my goal to disguise the Gospel or sneak it into someone's subconscious, I do believe that the Spirit can work in someone's heart, even if the person's knowledge of the Good News is purely intellectual. I have not decided when I would have this get-together. I need help from others in planning and hosting it. I will post here about my experiences starting next semester.

Please pray for me over the next few months. Pray that God will guide me and use me to reach others with the Gospel. Pray that I will driven by an unexplainable love for the lost and that I abandon any fear I have to be "all in". Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me and prayed for me over the course of my short ministry! Your continuous support means very much to me.

The Return to Trucks, Fried Chicken, and Football

"I am not anyone’s slave. But I have become a slave to everyone, so that I can win as many people as possible. When I am with the Jews, I live like a Jew to win Jews. They are ruled by the Law of Moses, and I am not. But I live by the Law to win them. And when I am with people who are not ruled by the Law, I forget about the Law to win them. Of course, I never really forget about the law of God. In fact, I am ruled by the law of Christ. When I am with people whose faith is weak, I live as they do to win them. I do everything I can to win everyone I possibly can."

- Paul, 1st Corinthians 9:19-22 CEV

Me wearing lederhosen and
holding a German gospel tract.

For the two months I served in Heidelberg, I took the advice of the apostle Paul and diligently tried to integrate myself into German society (as comically illustrated in the picture). Paul strived to build bridges between himself and those around him by integrating himself into local culture. However, he did not change his beliefs nor the Gospel he preached. A good example of Paul's attitude is was Acts 16:3, when Paul insisted Timothy be circumcised as was expected of a Jew, even a Christian Jew. It was not wrong for Timothy to be circumcised, but his circumcision allowed him to minister to the Jews and be accepted by them as a Jew.

In Germany, I refused to speak English unless talking with native English speakers. I ate a very typical German diet, where breakfast and dinner were always bread, jam, cheese, fruit, and vegetables. I drank four to six cups of coffee every day (although I do not like coffee) as well as schorle, a roughly 1:1 mixture of a fruit juice and carbonated water. I even bought a pair of European man-capris on clearance. I did not compromise my beliefs or the Gospel I represented. My goal was to build bridges to those with whom I spoke and genuinely get to know them. Because my attitude, dress, and mannerisms made it very obvious that I was not truly German and certainly not a tourist, I was often asked in the course of a conversation such as "What are you doing here?" and "Where did you learn to speak German so well?" These questions were an incredible way to open up and share not only about the CVJM but also more importantly about the Gospel. So many Germans have grown up hearing about Jesus' death and resurrection, but very few ever understand why. To some, Jesus was a only historical figure or wise teacher. To others, He was the son of an impersonal deity and had no desire to have anything to do with mankind other than "ruining" their fun. By integrating myself into the local culture, the Lord used me to share the Good News of His love in a way not impossible for a typical American.

After making such strides to change cultures, it was hard at first for me to reintegrate back into Alabama's strange way of life. As an introvert who had lived as an extrovert for the past two months, I spent much of the first few weeks back avoiding unnecessary social contact. I dreaded going to gatherings with large groups of people, and at times, I did not leave my dorm bedroom if I knew one of my roommates was in our common space. Once, I accepted a friend's invitation to go to a Campus Crusade worship time to force myself to get out. I found the whole thing quite disturbing, and it was not the even large amount of people that bothered me. What shocked me the most were the students at the door cheerfully greeting us as we walked in. They were literally jumping up and down while yelling how glad they were that we had come. I had not seen behavior like in a very long time. I would not have even expected it from a group of hyper-charismatics! It also took me a while to readjust to cold drinks, overly-sweetened food, overly-friendly people, English spoken in public, and the necessity of driving everywhere.

Click image to enlarge graphs.

What surprised and upset me most when I returned was the very stark difference in attitudes towards the evangelism between my church family and believers outside of my church. I did not expect or desire any recognition when I returned. From my point of few, my Lakeside family financed so much of the trip that I was very much indebted to them, not the other way around. Still, they were very eager to hear about all the work God had done in Germany, even though many kept up with this blog. However, when a believer outside of the church asked me what I did over the summer, I told them I spent the summer doing missions work in Germany. The believer would usually give me a very confused look. A campus minister who asked me that question responded with "Oh. Well... did you learn any German?" I found it really upsetting that a minister of all people would not ask me how God worked or what He did. These reactions from those outside my Lakeside family seem to change when someone talks about going on a mission trip to Africa, East Asia, or South America. I do not care about any recognition from my service, but the great difference in attitude towards "traditional" missions work and sharing the Gospel in Germany upset me very much. It seems as though these brothers and sister find to strange to bring the Gospel to white people. The sad fact is that every American is familiar with the last hundred years of German history, and most are still surprised to hear that only 1-2% of the population has ever decided to become disciples of Jesus. While decisions for Christ have exploded exponentially around the rest of the world, the amount of just nominal believers in Europe shrunk over 30% in the last century, and this percent change does not account for the increase in European population, meaning that even the overall number of nominal believers in Europe decreased dramatically while the overall population has increased. I hope I can begin to bring more attention to the dearth of the evangelism in not only Germany but also in all of Europe. The Lord has tasked us with sharing the Good News with everyone.

In the end, I have readjusted well to Alabama culture, although I am still holding on to some German tendencies. (I rarely drink something cold besides milk.) However, integrating into the culture here is just as important as integrating into German culture, because while I am home, I am still obligated to share the Gospel.

Back to Birmingham

“I have found that there are three stages in every great work of God; first, it is impossible, then it is difficult, then it is done.”

- Hudson Taylor

My dad and I at the Holy Land Experience.

On Monday, 5. August, we began our journey back to Pioneers' headquarters in Orlando. The trip was rather uneventful, although I felt progressively worse and worse until we arrived in the early hours of the next day. I wasn't quite sure what I had caught, but looking back on it, I would wager that it was some sort of bacteria I picked up in Munich with its intensity increased due to caffeine withdrawal. (As soon as I was in Munich, I went from drinking four to six cups of coffee per day to none at all. The stupidity of this decision did not hit me until several weeks after I returned.) My temperature was the worst point was 101, four degrees higher than my usual temperature of 97.

Debriefing at Pioneer's headquarters consisted mainly of sharing with each other about our summer work, re-adapting to American culture, and dealing with an American's possible reactions towards the work we did. I missed the first half of debriefing since I could not really tolerate being out of bed, but the Pioneers staff and my team were very understanding and caring.

Herod's temple featured in the scale model of Jerusalem.

I was  ready to be home after debriefing, but my family stopped again in Ocala to visit our cousins. The visit was wonderful and allowed us some more time to visit with each other and catch up. We visited a local spring-fed lake that offered a glass-bottom boat ride. The lake was beautiful, even though we shared it with several crocodiles. We also visited the Holy Land Experience, a local theme park that offered Bible-based attractions. We watched a reenactment of a priest offering the sacrifice in the Holy of Holies, examined a room-sized scale model of Jerusalem from the early first century, and watched a play depicting the life of a very lively, Pentecostal Jesus who ran up and down the aisles of the theater yelling and healing people in the audience. When the time came for my family to head home on Sunday, we said our goodbyes to my cousins and left for Birmingham. Although we had a good time visiting in Ocala, I was looking forward to sleeping in my own bed.

Munich

The cards and gifts that I left for each of the Hofmanns

On Wednesday night, 31 July, I said good-bye to all of the wonderful people with whom I worked at the CVJM. I am not very good at this sort of thing, and it felt rather awkward to me. That evening, Petra, Jan, and I sat and skyped with my parents one last time. Jan was fascinated seeing himself on the computer but was rather shy in speaking or singing. (This is probably only the second time he has been shy this summer!) He eventually warmed up to my parents, and I wound up translating sentences such as "Dwarves are growing upstairs" and "There are chickens under the coffee table." My mom and Petra made small talk about vacationing. After skyping, Jörg, Petra, and I settled down in the living room and watched Mama Mia dubbed in German. After rushed good-byes to Jörg, Petra, and Jan Thursday morning, I met the rest of the team at the CVJM. We then traveled to Munich for a mini-vacation.

The Glockenspiel at night

Upon arrival in Munich, we checked into a youth hostel that was conveniently located ten minutes from the heart of Old Munich (Altstadt). We ventured down into this part and ate at a restaurant on the main street. (I had actually eaten here when I was in Munich in 2007.) I then explored the Altstadt with a few teammates, and we eventually laid down in the Marienplatz and stared up at the Glockenspiel.

"Becoming a disciple of Jesus Christ
is the only way to Heaven on Earth!"

Even being on vacation is no excuse to not share the Gospel, especially in a country as spiritually dark as Germany. That Thursday night, I started leaving a few coins and a Gospel track with each street performer whom I passed. I tried to keep this up through my time in Munich. On the way back to the hostel, I noticed some Christian graffiti written on the inside of the Karlstor (a famous medieval city gate). I would never have expected to see something like that! I made sure to leave five tracks in the wall near the writing.

Outside the Hofbräuhaus

On Friday, 2 August, I went at noon with the group to see the Glockenspiel play. I really enjoyed it, and I was very curious how it could possibly work. I then broke away from the group and visited the German Museum. It is a main attraction in Munich and contains exhibits about German scientific and technological history. There was an interesting exhibit on electrical history, but it gave me a headache trying to decipher the name plaques and technical descriptions written in German. The last and most interesting exhibit I visited was the multi-story aviation section. Unfortunately, the museum closed before I could see all of the exhibit. After close, I went to the hostel and showered, and then I met the team at the Hofbräuhaus to eat in the courtyard and fellowship. I ate a large pig knuckle, two weisswurst, and potato dumplings. Needless to say, I was happily stuffed with traditional German food and slept well that night.

Me in lederhosen posing
with a Gospel track

On Dachau's front gate:
"Work will make you free"

Saturday morning, we went to C & A and tried on lederhosen. After a nice lunch, Josh, Lynne, and I went to visit Dachau, the infamous Nazi work camp located outside of Munich. I had been before, but I did not remember very much. It was disturbing to look around and contemplate what had happened there. I found almost as upsetting the loud, chatty American tourists who were also visiting. It seemed as though they were missing the significance of where they were. However, I am certainly very glad I returned to Dachau. It's certainly not a cheery place, but I think it is important for every tourist visiting Munich to tour this concentration camp and learn its gruesome history.

A memorial to those who died at Dachau. The memorial depicts bodies
mangled in a barbed-wire fence.

Sunday, 5 August, turned out to be an interesting day. Because our two teammates from Croatia and North Ireland had left on Saturday, only the five of us Americans were left. We watched the Glockenspiel play again at noon and then boarded our train to Heidelberg. At the train's next stop in Augsburg, the conductor informed us that the tracks ahead were blocked, and the train could not continue until the obstruction was removed. My team waited with the train for four hours, but we eventually took the recommendation of Mary and train company officials. Because we would drive from Heidelberg to the Frankfurt Airport the next day, my team traveled back to Munich and took a train bound for Frankfurt. We checked into a hotel there around 1 A.M. Monday morning. Needless to say, the last day in Munich was exhausting and frustrating, but in hindsight, it turned out to be a rather amusing adventure!

Children's Camp

“This generation of Christians is responsible for this generation of souls on the earth!”

- Keith Green

Explaining a game to the children

Monday morning, 7 August, we started our first children’s camp for kids seven to eleven years old. It ran for most of the day, from 10:30 A.M. to 5 P.M. Unlike the English camp, which my team planned and conducted, the children’s camp was put on by CVJM members, and the Pioneers team was simply helping with activities. The day started out rather rough. One of the one of the adults was in a bad mood, and I also found out that I could not chaperon the canoe trip, as our team had planned for me to do, simply because of church politics. (It's rather sad to have church politics without even being a church.)

Magnetic soccer

Except for the day’s introduction gathering, closing gathering, and a few camp-wide activities, the children were free to roam from several stations, mainly soccer/recreation, crafts, origami, ping-pong, and rock climbing. Instead of canoeing, I was assigned to run the ping-pong station.  I was given two ping-pong tables without nets, so I used my engineering abilities and made some makeshift nets from discarded Styrofoam insulation and duct tape. In order to allow more children to play, I even fashioned an extra one-against-one table from an unused folding table in the area. It wound up that the children were too young to have any extended interest in ping-pong, so I also showed them where the foosball and magnetic soccer tables were. Based on a suggestion from Klaus, I even set up a game on Tuesday that involved throwing a small, weighted bottle at seven larger, weighted bottles with assorted point values; it was like a combination of bowling and horseshoes.

Foosball, the most lively and most enjoyed of my games

Despite my initial job responsibilities, my job evolved more into making sure that all the children had partners for the games and that none felt left-out. Several people mentioned to me how much they appreciated me doing this, and in the end, I think it was much more important for me to be interacting with the children at the CVJM than being with just a few children in a canoe. In total, we had around fifty children attend the camp, and most of these come from non-Christian or nominal-Christian households. I was very glad to get to know some of them. Each of whom had his or her own unique personality, likes and dislikes, favorite activities, and backgrounds. I am honored to think that perhaps God was using me to make an eternal difference in these children’s lives.

The group game on Wednesday was rather fun. The objective was for the children to individually search for small pictures of a beaver hidden around the CVJM. When a child found a beaver, he or she had to bring the beaver to a special table to get credit for the child’s team. The children could only have one beaver at a time in their hands, and “sheriffs” wearing cowboy hats would watch to make sure the children followed this rule. My job was to hide the beavers before and during the game. I made sure to hide some in obvious places, some in small nooks and crannies, and some far out of the children’s reach. To my surprise, the children managed to find even the best hidden and reach the most unobtainable. I personally enjoyed hiding beavers under the sheriffs’ hats and later watching the sheriffs attacked by a swam of grabby children. I continued to hide beavers as the children were searching. It took them a long time to figure out what I was doing, even though I was also simply dropping many of the beavers on the ground. When some did figure it out, I stopped hiding beavers and hid in the bathroom, where I tossed some out of the window until I could safely leave.

Skit for morning gathering with Dr. Tutmirweh

Many CVJM members were giving of their time and talents in assisting with the camp. I was rather upset that the only time we discussed Jesus was during the introduction and closing gatherings. Even though the children’s camp resembled a condensed VBS, the activities during gatherings were not related to anything the children were taught during the gatherings, nor did the activities reinforce concepts the children learned. I suggested this possibility to one of the workers, to whom this was a new and unusual idea. The gatherings in themselves were very well done; we sang German Christian children’s songs, learned about Biblical characters, and heard about the Good News. On Tuesday morning, I played a patient who had a stomach ache for Dr. "Tutmirweh" ("it hurts") . The doctor refused to see me, but he did give me candy as the solution to my stomach ache!

Explaining salvation with the bridge diagram

Overall, the children’s camp went very well. I was very glad to help make even a very small part in the children’s lives and possibly in their eternal destinations. This generation of children is growing up in a very secular and God-less society. They are brought up to question the existence of God and any afterlife. It is good that the American Church sends out so many missionaries all over the world, but we must wake up to the fact that western and central Europe is a spiritual wilderness. Numerically, the number of Christ-followers in Europe over the last hundred years has steadily declined, while the count of believers in Africa, Asia, and Latin America has exploded exponentially. For more information, read my post “Why Europe?”

Denglisch & the Tourist Missionary

"You may say that there are still four months until harvest time. But I tell you to look, and you will see that the fields are ripe and ready to harvest."

- Jesus, John 4:35 CEV

“Our God of Grace often gives us a second chance, but there is no second chance to harvest a ripe crop.”

- Kurt von Schleicher

On Thursday, 25 July, the team started an English camp for children eleven to fifteen. (Most of the children were around twelve or thirteen.) The goal for the children was to only speak English. The thirteen- and fourteen-year-olds already spoke conversational English fairly well. We had about fifteen kids on this day. With two exceptions, the children were all from families outside the CVJM; this means that many of them come from non-Christian or nominal-Christian homes. We started teaching them John 3:16, our camp Bible verse. We also played a few games with them, including a water balloon toss, blind-fold obstacle course, and a water collection relay, which we basically made up on the spot and did not making any sense. Still, I believe most of the children still had fun playing it.

On Friday, 26 July, we took the children canoeing on a stream that runs through Meckesheim. I had three of the older boys in my boat, and I was steering. It was rather difficult, because two of the boys were rather strong willed in terms of how to canoe, and all three would randomly stop paddling. Thus, we spent a lot of time running into the bank. Before turning back, we stopped to go swimming in an area of small rapids. The water was rather fast, and there were many drop-offs and large rocks hiding not far below the surface. While we all went away with some minor bruises, the children still had a lot of fun.

On the return trip, I tried asking the boys in my boat if they followed Jesus or knew what it meant to do so. At first, I asked a few times in English and received no response, so I asked in German. One or two answered with a simple “ja”, but they made it obvious that they did not want to discuss this topic, so I left them simply with an invitation to church Sunday morning. I was rather upset about this conversation, because none of my boys, whom I had spent the last two days getting to know, seemed to have any idea what it means to have a relationship with Jesus. We arrive back at the CVJM sooner than expected.

After arriving, I realized that our team had shared two testimonies and taught the children John 3:16, but no one had ever planned to explain the verse and share the Gospel behind it. Being a camp co-planner with two other teammates, I suggested taking advantage of our extra time and doing just this. Those two teammates were OK with the idea but did not want to talk to the children, because they have not previously prepared something. (How well do we actually understand the Gospel if we must formulate how to share it ahead of time, especially on a mission trip?) Thus, I walked the kids through the four points, which I use as a basic roadmap to explain the Gospel. We started with “For God so loved” and how God has loved us from before we were even created. Next, I moved onto “the world”, and how we have all done wrong. Then I continued to “that he gave his only Son” and how Jesus, never having sinned, died to take the death penalty that we all deserve. At the fourth point, I concluded the discussion with “so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life”, explained what it means to follow Jesus and dying to yourself, and left them with the question “What are you going to do now that you know all this?” What I find really sad is that these kids have come to previous CVJM summer camps, and it seems to have made no difference in their lives. Granted, a group fifteen children is not a representative sample of all the children who have attended these camps in the past; however, I find the apathy of some of these kids upsetting.

Me at the top of Heidelberg's Church of the Holy Ghost

I spent Saturday, 27 June mainly running final errands in Heidelberg to buy mainly tourist paraphernalia, because I had saved my tourist shopping for the end of the trip. I was excited when I found a clearanced pair of three-quarter pants, which is a fashion trend in Europe for both genders. (I actually call these pants “Euopean man kapris”.) I visited some tourist shops and bought a Nutcracker Christmas tree ornament as well as a German Christmas pyramid. While buying a shirt at a tourist stand, an employee struck up a conversation and asked why I was in Heidelberg, because most tourists could not speak German as easily as I could. While my teammates shy away from this question and say they are students or tourists, I like to use it as an inroad into sharing the Gospel and giving the questioner a Four Points tract. The employee and I started talking about God, His involvement in human affairs, and why there is suffering in the world. The lady believed that God stays out of humans' lives and expects them to engage in conflict resolution such as war. She said that she had never understood how God could love humans so much and why He would send His Son to die for them. This provided me with an excellent chance to share the complete Gospel with her. She was so interested that she even called an associate over to take her place helping customers. When she had to get back to work, I left her a Four Points tract and explain that many of her questions were also answered in the videos online.

The view from Königstuhl over Heidelberg and Mannheim.

I spent the rest of Saturday at Königstuhl. I also attempted to meet about half of our team at Solution, the Exchange-equivalent for young adults. However, I could not get in touch with them and did not know exactly where Solution was that week. I found out later that Solution turned out to be social hour; so many staff members were at the wedding of a CVJM member and a former Pioneer Venturer that Solution was canceled.

It’s rather sad that many German believers seem to have this same casual attitude towards corporate worship. I can't generalize from just my experience, but Wilfriend, one of my Bremen contacts, told me that this is the case for most of Germany. Some German believers give lip service to praise and teaching, yet services can be canceled on a whim such as with Solution. In addition, the next few weeks are the Baden-Würtenburg school system’s summer holidays, and the CVJM is completely closed and not holding services. I don’t know exactly how many German families are away during this time, but this seems like the time to have youth activities. This is especially true since our CVJM founders’ vision was to have a Christian community center for young people.

Sunday, 28 July, was our last worship service with our CVJM family. Klaus and Trude gave us each a few small gifts and a thank you card. They also prayed over us. One of my teammates preached from Acts about how radically different the apostles lived their lives in order to tell others about the Good News. (For some reason, my teammates have preached four sermons all from Acts.) I was rather offended and upset by the sermon, because the teammate who preached it has been less than enthusiastic about putting words to actions. Although he says he feels called to missions, it seems like he has avoided talking about Jesus more often than not. Although he has had the chance to witness to others through relationships, it doesn't seem like he has chosen to do so.

While I know God wants me here in Germany, I am looking forward to getting home.

Why Are We Here?

“The Church exists for nothing else but to draw men into Christ, to make them little Christs. If they are not doing that, all the cathedrals, clergy, missions, sermons, even the Bible itself, are simply a waste of time. God became Man for no other purpose.”

- C.S. Lewis

“The worst crime of the desert is knowing where the water is and not telling.”

- Unknown

“What are we here for - to have a good time with the Christians or to save sinners?”

- Malla Moe

It's been hard for me to describe my feelings the past few weeks. I often feel that my desire to share the Gospel is more intense than with others, and this is reflected in this blog post, which I wrote last Sunday. Since last Thursday, we conducted an English camp and a children's camp. I will hopefully have time to post about those tomorrow.

After I arrived in Heidelberg on Wednesday afternoon, 17. July, I joined the team to practice our rendition of the Lifehouse Everything skit. The plan was to perform the skit while doing evangelism on Friday afternoon. After a quick dinner, we headed to the neighboring town of Sinsheim to visit a refugee camp. The refugees, who come from the Middle-East and north Africa, have paid to be trafficked into Europe (Germany, in particular). Because the refugees are in the EU illegally, the German government herds them into various camps, where the refugees must live until their asylum cases are granted or they are granted "tolerance". (Given Germany's not-so-distant past, one would think that the German government would be less inclined to consolidate unwanted people groups into camps.) Until receiving asylum status, refugees cannot work legally. They are provided with food of debatable quality and 200 Euros "allowance". Asylum cases are difficult for the refugees, because many were told by the traffickers to tell certain lies to the government upon reaching Germany in order to increase their chances of receiving asylum. However, the German government searches for inconsistencies and asks very specific questions attempting to catch the refugees in a lie. For many of these refugees, deciding to follow Jesus can be a reason to receive asylum, and many will truly ask Him into their lives. However, local judges have the authority to rule whether these decisions are "genuine", and no amount of paperwork from a church or statements from German believers seems to influence the rulings. Rather, judges seem to rule on conversions based on the amount of previous inconsistencies in refugees' stories. An asylum case can be appealed once, and if the appeal is denied, refugees can be granted legal "tolerance", which delays their deportation. Interestingly, many refugees destroy their paperwork before coming to Germany. In this way, the Germany government cannot deport them, because the government does not know to what country they should be sent.

I can certainly see the government's perspective on the situation. People from foreign countries are coming coming to Germany with a foreign culture, language, and way of life. Most of them don't have any sort of identifying papers, and the German bureaucrats, whose entire existence revolves around paper-pushing, must attempt to sort them out. These foreigners take arguably about 500 Euros per month from the German social system, factoring in allowance, food, and space to sleep in the camp, yet they pay nothing in taxes. In spite of this, I must sympathize with the refugees. The journey to Europe often involves much thirst, rape, and death, as much for the men as for the women. Those who survive the journey arrive in Germany only to find that they cannot work legally and must live together in camps. Three people or a family live in a room of about 120 sq. ft. The restrooms are often are very disgusting, with water from toilettes above leaking down to the bathroom below. (Toilette is probably an exaggeration. A better description would be hole in the floor.) There are no soap or paper towers in the restrooms, because the government argues that the children at the camp would break them. However, Autobahn rest-stops always have soap and paper towels. Food provided for the refugees is often stale or otherwise not in edible condition.

A small Christian organization, SAM, works with the refugees in this area to provide extra food, German classes, Bible studies, and also to press German bureaucrats to improve the living conditions in the camps. It was SAM workers who took us to visit the camps. Afterwards, the girls left, and the guys stayed behind to pass out bread to the children. (It is currently Ramadan, and only the children are allowed to eat during daylight.) Unfortunately, the refugees' situation has created a culture of dependence there. The children swarmed around us and each took two or three bread rolls/pretzels/sticks each, despite our protests to only take one. Not one child said "thank you", and one even had the nerve to bring back a piece that was slightly burnt on the bottom and complain. We stayed around another hour or two and visited with a very hospitable refugee from Iran who had recently been very ill. Overall, I was glad I visited the camp, and I wish I could go back. (Fun fact: 21 out of 83 people groups in Germany are considered "unreached" by the Joshua Project. It is estimated that only 1%-2% of the total population has relationships with Christ.)

On Thursday, 18. July, I went with Jonny and Nicole to spend a few hours visiting with a woman from the CVJM named Silka. She fixed us a wonderful lunch, and I also played chess with her nine-year-old son. He was very enthusiastic about telling me how to play. I kept trying to set him up to win, but he insisted that he would not take advantage of my mistakes! At the coffee house social, we discussed morality. I don’t remember a thing that was said, but there were even few people there than the week before. After the meeting, we hung around chatting about how Nutella and peanut butter taste different in other parts of the world.

The Gospel tracts that I am currently
passing out. On the back is an explanation
of the Gospel in English.

On Friday morning, 19. July, I worked on the website. On Friday afternoon, our team was supposed to evangelize and perform our rendition of the Lifehouse Everything skit on the Neckarwiese. We were scheduled to work from one to four, but as is typical for the team, wespent one to two-thirty eating and they spent two-thirty to four chatting with each other on the Neckarwiese. (Unfortunately, Alan made me accompany him on a fruitless errand during this time, so I had no say in the matter.) At four, Alan and I returned with Mary, and we performed our skit twice over the next hour. I would estimate that about twenty people saw our skit, and most of them were interested. Statistically, nineteen and a half out of these twenty people are going to Hell; in spite of this stark reality, I could not convince any of our team, including Alan, to talk with these people afterwards. I wound up talking with two groups of people, four young adults (who had clapped after our performance) and a class of around twelve fifth graders. The class was particularly interested in my tracts, because they found the puzzle intriguing, and they had also just completed their first year of English. Each child took a tract, and one girl even took two extras for friends. Johnny came over and joined me talking to the class, and I asked him to share his testimony. He felt put on the spot but recounted in German how he decided to give his life to Christ when he was the age of these students. After talking to the children, Johnny and I joined the rest of the team, who had gone to buy ice cream. I shared with them about the awesome opportunity we had to share the Gospel with these children, but the group was more interested in telling us how one teammate had just frozen her lips to her ice cream bar. We had Friday evening off, but I decided to hang out with Ten Sing and spend more time getting to know the youth.

Saturday, 20. July, proved to be another stressful construction day. It started well, with Mary keeping us all busy, and we accomplished a good deal. She left after lunch, and everything went down hill from there. Alan kept us mainly standing around while he worked and rarely provided us with any jobs. I attempted to cut boards for the floor, but a teammate took that task from me. (This team member is very possessive of the flooring job, and has more than once referred to the area as "his" loft.) I gave up trying to do any work and just waited for Alan to tell me what to do. We eventually finished our flooring job and posed for pictures. I found this very upsetting; even though we did a small job for the CVJM, we wasted much time and money in doing that job. I feel rather ashamed to say I was a part of it, because it took a summer of work to finish something so simple.

I found out a few days later that the group went to our favorite local restaurant after work without inviting me. I wouldn't have wanted to go and spend more time with the group, but we have established a relationship with the restaurant's owner, and I (only I, unfortunately) have used that relationship to talk with the owner about Jesus. However, I was mainly upset because I wasn't invited. I know that sounds very childish, but our team has made such a big deal about being there for each other, loving one another, and spending time in "fellowship".

Meckesheim's state-supported protestant church

Sunday, 21. July, was a little better. Because the local protestant church service started before the CVJM service, I went to it to see what it was like. The music was very pretty, and I especially liked the organ. The church is pastored by a husband and wife who alternate Sundays. The wife preached on this particular Sunday about the Jesus healing the blind man in John 9. She made some good points in her sermon, but the sermon seemed rather fluffy. Perhaps that sermon is not typical of the church, because the members of the CVJM who live in Meckesheim seem to hold her in high regard. I was rather upset how very few people were in the service; by my count, there were no more than fifty. (However, I could not see who was sitting in the balcony.) Those in attendance were mostly senior adults. Petra told me this could be because there were about twenty parents and children who attended the church's monthly children's worship service. Still, this doesn't account for many more.

At the CVJM service, Nicole, Beth, Danjela, and I performed a skit to advertise for our then-upcoming English camp. During an open mic part of worship, Alan came up and said he had felt the Holy Spirit lay it on his heart that the church members were like sheep who all want to go in their own direction. He said that we must work together to accomplish something. I felt like Alan spent far too much time looking at me when he said all this. Still, the lack of a pastor and strong leadership combined with the tendency of some to be less-than-organized is a big problem at the CVJM. (Several people have mentioned to me that this problem caused a schism in the CVJM a few years back.) It was a good thing for Alan to say, and as passive as he is, it's good that he had the courage to say it.

The remains of Saint Martin's Chapel
Watchtower/alter

I spent the rest of Sunday hanging around the house. Somehow, I wound up playing school with Timm, Jan, and their two Grandmothers. In the evening, I went back to visit Saint Martin's Chapel again before we live. I took my Bible to read, but I wound up having to go into town to read due to the abundance of bees that have recently taken to the German countryside in mass. As I was on my way home, I passed a van of my teammates and young people from the CVJM. It turns out they had gone back to the lake and not invited me. I wouldn't have wanted to go, but it still hurt that so many people, including some from the CVJM, would go again and not even tell me. I decided to make them feel really embarrassed, so I waved and flashed a very friendly smile. They looked surprised and embarrassed when they saw me. They drove away, but I passed by them at the train station, and they invited me to come chat with them. We talked for a while, and them I went home and skyped with my parents for two hours.

The loft, with (almost) finished sub-flooring and insulation

The next Monday and Tuesday consisted mainly of website work, especially Tuesday, when I put in several extra hours to make the site presentable so Mary could preview it later in the week. Monday evening, we met at Saskia's parents' house for a barbecue and social time. It was fun to see everyone for a little while, but I enjoyed working alone on Tuesday. On that Wednesday, we hung insulation in the loft and prepared for the English camp on Thursday.

I have not really been sure how to describe the time since I have come back from Bremen. I have had a muddle of feelings regarding the team, ministry, and purpose in Heidelberg. I often feel as though we pat ourselves on the back simply for playing missions. I feel like there's no real passion here to reach the lost; rather, we seem to spend a lot of time going through the motions. More and more, I lay down at night feeling a mixture of disappointment with my team, anger that we don't take our task seriously, and loneliness in that no one seems to realize just how serious our task is. In addition, there is not really anyone I can talk to about the problems.

A typical example of the problems is this story, which I had previously omitted from my blog:

A Pioneers staff member from the US visited us for a few days at the beginning of the month. The only time she and I ever had a serious discussion was her last night in Heidelberg. I was excitedly telling her about the surveys and the tram evangelism. I made a joke along the lines of "The Germans don't really know what to think when we do this sort of stuff. Culturally, you rarely approach someone you don't know in public and speak with them. Certainly the last thing they would want you to talk about it Jesus." The staff member replied, "Well, maybe you should talk with Mary and Alan about finding a culturally appropriate way of ministry."

I sat stunned at how this staffer seemed not to understand the very Message around which her job revolved. The "culturally appropriate" method of evangelism in Germany is not to evangelize. Period. But that's the way it was in the first century. The first Christians died because of their offensive message. Many Christians around still die because of their message. We as believers claim to follow the Bible. However, there is not one red letter in that book that was culturally acceptable or polite. While tens of thousands around the world plummet into Hell every day, we as Christians remain silent because we don't want to be "pushy" or "rude" or because we are afraid of what people will think of us. We can forget about the genocides of Communist China and the Third Reich. The greatest atrocity in history is the Church's own apathy.

In conclusion, Satan has searched out every way possible to interfere with the Lord’s work here in Germany. I know that God willed for me to be working here with the CVJM this summer. I really covet the prayers of my Lakeside family. Pray also that the team and the CVJM and my team remain focused on our work in the three days we have left.